Media and Muslim Women

Muslim Women, Media and Social Media

I recently attended a lecture with my aunt and was truly impressed with the moderate approach Islam is starting to take. As a communication consultant myself with a vested interest in Islam from both mystical and practical level, I felt that light should be shed on two areas by posing very practical questions: 

Is it the cakes fault you are bulimic ?

The usage of basic animal instinct (sex) to attract someone is due to the lack of ability to attract a partner by means of elevated consciousness, healthy self esteem, patience, and true value of what matters between men and women.

If we look at the essence of the problem its a lack of healthy connection to God, which leads to ever more destructive tendencies. The idea is to support women and men to integrate and have an independent connection to God in order to build healthy relationships with the inner self, the community and untimely to God.

Hence, it is important to encourage all elements that fall under the sex banner which is attraction, compassion, tolerance, love, mercy and family. Looking at sex from a healthy perspective embraces the unity amongst men and women, increases healthy dynamics with children, and builds constructive healthy societies.

Condemning women sexuality  reinforces the masculine, suppressing the feminine and making women resent themselves further more reinforcing negative tendencies and lack of connection to God.

Is smoking cannabis bad for you?

Cannabis is both a poison and a cure, depending on who your consumer is it can help you through the pain of cancer or it can be an excuse to leave your stressful life and achieve “nothing” in this world or hereafter. 

Same applies to social media and everything in life. As Hadith narrated in Boukari says “ Ina al aamal bil niyat” Its the intention and mindset that effects the outcome. 

Hence, the encouragement for our women in the community to use social media in a wise and constructive way by increasing the desire to share and learn positive message, is the healthy approach that scholars should take. Condemning social media and women in media in general also reinforces the problem by increased suppression.

This was written to aid the growth of the feminine is a healthy manner to build more stable nurturing societies as a whole.

By Jana Sharaf

Public affairs, Philosopher, and Founder of "NOON EVE"

Revelations - A tool for creative growth

“Sometimes it (revelations) comes humming in my ears and I understand what it is revealing, sometimes the angel comes in a form of a man and I clearly understand what he is saying”

 A revelation is revealing an idea that is concealed.  Ideas are important parts of our growth, as they enhance creativity, innovation and problem solving.

The verse above is a narration showing 2 ways in which ideas (revelations) come to people.

1.) An idea that rings in your ear and you are forced to be captivated by it.

Sometimes we don't need to be dreaming, visualizing or mediating to have a great idea. While we walk we sometimes get a thought, that thought forms a complete pattern, with this pattern you get increased energy to act. This is a revelation. 

Revelations don't need to be logical, and you don't need to fight them back. Act upon your thoughts if they come with increased physical energy.

2.) Angels who are messenger come in the form of people.

Other times we receive ideas from other people. If we require help ask in the right way and set an intention for an answer observe how many other people will answer your question.

The more you listen the more you realize that humans around us are always giving us ideas, revelation and answering our questions. 

Don’t resist listen with an open heart.

By Jana Sharaf

Public affairs, Philosopher, and Founder of "NOON EVE"

أفكار النوم

قد تتداخل أفكارك في كثير من الأحيان مع نومك عن طريق إطالة أمدك الى ما يسمى ب " دورة القلق " و نتيجة لذلك تمنع من النوم والراحة بشكل صحيح

دورة للقلق

الفكر : التفكير السلبي يؤدي إلى

الشعور : القلق : الجسم والعقل في حالة منشطة

السلوك : مسح الجسم ، والبيئة، والأفكار

الفكر ....و تستمر الدورة

عندما يتم تنشيط الجسم والعقل الحواس " يبدأ بالتكبير" و كثيرا ما يكشف أشياء صغيرة  لا علاقة لها ككونها تهديدات.

كيفية كسر دورة من القلق

تخيل ان تستيقظ  في الساعة 3 صباحا و في ذهنك " أنا لن أكون قادر على العمل غدا"ً

انك عليك تحدي هذا التفكر!

·    ما هي الأدلة التي تدعم هذه الفكرة ؟

·    ما هي الأدلة التي تعارض هذه الفكرة ؟

·    هل هناك تفسير بديل ؟

·    ما هو أسوأ ما قد يحدث ؟

·    هل يمكن أن اتخطاه ؟

·    ما هو أفضل ما قد يحدث؟

·    ما هي النتيجة الأكثر واقعية ؟

·    ماذا قد أود قوله ل______ (صديق ) إذا كانت في الوضع نفسه ؟

·    كيف يمكن لشخص آخر أن يفهم  الوضع ذاته ؟

ما هي الافكار البدياة التي قد تراودك ؟

الوضع	الخواطر التلقائية	المشاعر	الافكار البديلة	المشاعر
مستيقظا في السرير في منتصف الليل	" لن أقدر على العمل غداً."	القلق 80%	"لم أنم جيدا في ليلة من الاسبوع الماضي ولكن كان لا يزال بامكاني ان أعمل. قد لا أكون نائمة  ولكنني مستريحة."	القلق 25%

من خلال إيجاد الفكر البديل ، الاضطراب و القلق يتقلصان و تضعف الدورة أو تنكسر حتى يأتي النوم بسهولة أكبر.

طرق أخرى لتوقيف "سباق العقل":

·                      السماح للأفكار ان تأتي وتذهب, على سبيل المثال , قطار يمر من محطة ما (تمرين الارنب الوردي)

·                      التركيز على شيء ممتع و / أو ممل, مثل عد الأغنام

·                      فكر في شيء  يجذب انتباهك

3 عوامل مهمة  تجعله من الصعب عليك ان تحكم على كمية النوم التي تحصل عليها:

1 . "النوم الجمود " - 3-20 دقيقة بعد الاستيقاظ ما زلنا " نصف نائمون " ، و في حالة ذهول ، " الخروج منها"

2 . "نوم البداية " يعتبر شيئاً من لغزالوقت! حتى مع الآلات التكنولوجية الحديثة ، لا يمكننا أن نعرف بالضبط متى يبدأ النوم.

3 . " القلق " - تظهر الأبحاث أنه عندما نقلق – ويتسابق عقلنا - يمر الوقت بسرعة أكبر. فحتى 30 دقيقة من محاولتنا للنوم قد نشعر كأنها ساعة !

التفكير في المشكلة نومك

قد وجدت الأبحاث أن الجميع تقريبا

·    يستخف كمية النوم الذي يحصل عليه

·    يبالغ في الوقت الذي يستغرقه إلى ان ينام

معتقداتك ومواقفك حول النوم هي مهمة

بعض من الأشياء التي يمكنك القيام بها

1 . توسيع الهدف المعين, على سبيل المثال ,لا تضع قواعد ثابتة حول النوم

2 . الاعتراف بأنك ان لم تشعر بالاستراحة الكاملة  في بعض الأيام هو أمر طبيعي، حتى بعد ليلة نوم جيدة

3 . الاعتراف بأن هناك المزيد من الأشياء التي تقدر على التحكم بها مثل:

· الجدول الزمني غير النظامي للنوم

· القيلولة النهار

· قضاء الكثير من الوقت في السرير

ما لا تفعله:

·    المبالغة في جديَتها لأن هذا يمكن أن يؤدي إلى مزيد من القلق ، على سبيل المثال " إنني ابدو عشر سنوات أكبر لانني لم أنم ليلة البارحة "

·    دع عالمك يدور حول النوم

·    الغاء أنشطة فذلك يمنحك المزيد من الوقت للقلق من الليلة القادمة

ما تفعله:

·    انجز الأشياء عادي جداً حتى لو لم تحصل على ليلة من النوم الحسن

·    حتى لو كنت لا تنام ، تمتع بالراحة والاسترخاء ، فمن الممكن أن يساعداك

·    تقبل أن مشاكل النوم ليست بخطرة

حظا سعيداً ! ابقى هادءاً ونم جيداً ...

الدكتورة اناستازيا بوريمولوفو

مستشارة نفسية

Sleep Feelings

How to deal with Thoughts and Worries

Bedtime Wind-Down

·         A routine for 60-90 minutes before going to bed

·         That is – before the Threshold Time

Approximate Evening Time	Planned Schedule
10.00 – 11.15	Work/Activity Completed Relaxation time (reading boring books, TV, herbal teas, burning oils, soft music, relaxation exercises etc)
11.15	Pre-bed sequence (lock-up, change, wash)
11.30	Retire bed Practice relaxation

IMPORTANT:

Your bedtime Wind-Down shouldn’t become a source of anxiety for you.

Do your best to stick to it…

The aim is to do these kinds of things towards bedtime, in the right order,

which will lead to you feeling more relaxed…

Relaxation Training

Learning to relax is like learning a new skill.

It takes time and can mean changing the habits of a lifetime

The goal of relaxation is…relaxation

Relaxing is about “letting go”, not about striving…

Sleep comes more easily when you are relaxed

Your Relaxation Program

Here are steps you should follow for your relaxation program:

1.      Practice relaxation at a convenient time you have set aside.

2.      Wind down during the second half of the night.

3.      Slow down or stop doing work/activity 90 minutes before bed.

4.      Practice relaxation routine while in bed:

a)     Concentrate on breathing as a cue to the relaxation response

b)     Tense and relax muscles systematically.

c)      Take exercises slowly – do not over tense muscles.

5.      Practice, practice, practice…

© King’s College London

Good luck and sleep well!

Dr. Anastasia Burelomova

Trainee Counseling Psychologist

Sleep thoughts

Your thoughts may often interfere with your sleep by protracting you into so-called “cycle of worry” and as a result stop you from falling asleep and resting properly.

CYCLE OF WORRY

THOUGHT: Negative Thought Leads to….

FEELING: Worry: Body and Mind are “ACTIVATED”

BEHAVIOUR: Scanning body, environment, and thoughts

THOUGHT… And the cycle continues.

When Body and Mind are activated senses “zoom-in” and so often detect small, unrelated things as threats.

How to break a Cycle of Worry

Imagine, you wake up at 3 am and you think “I won’t be able to function tomorrow”.

You need to challenge that thought!!!

·       What is the evidence that supports this idea?

·       What is the evidence against this idea?

·       Is there an alternative explanation?

·       What is the worst that could happen?

·       Could I live through it?

·       What is the best that could happen?

·       What is the most realistic outcome?

·       What would I tell______(a friend) if he she were in the same situation?

·       How would someone else interpret the same situation?

What alternative thought could you have?

Situation	Automatic Thoughts	Feelings	Alternative Thoughts	Feelings
Awake in bed in the middle of the night	“I won’t be able to function tomorrow”.	Anxious 80%	“I did not sleep so well one night last week but I could still function. I may not be sleeping, but I am resting”.	Anxious 25%

By finding and Alternative Thought, Worry and Anxious feelings are reduced and the cycle is weakened or broken so sleep will come more easily.

Other ways to stop a “Racing Mind”

·       Allow thoughts to come and go e.g. train passing through a station (pink bunny exercise)

·       Concentration on something pleasurable and/or boring e.g. counting sheep

·       Think of something that will take your attention

3 BIG FACTORS that make it difficult to judge how much sleep you’ve had:

1.     “Sleep Inertia”- 3-20 minutes after waking we’re still “half-asleep”, dazed, “out-of-it”

2.     “Sleep Onset” is a bit of mystery time! Even with hi-tech machines, we can’t know exactly when sleep starts.

3.     “Worry” – research shows that when we worry – and our mind races – time seems to pass more quickly. So 30 minutes trying to get to sleep may seem like and hour!

Thinking about your sleep problem

Research has found that almost everyone

·       Underestimates how much sleep they get

·       Overestimates the time it takes them to go to sleep

Your beliefs and attitudes about sleep are important

Some things you can do

1.     Widen the Goal Posts e.g. don’t have fixed rules about sleep

2.     Recognise that not feeling completely rested some days is normal, EVEN AFTER a good night’s sleep

3.     Recognise that there are more things within your control such as:

·       Irregular sleep schedule

·       Daytime napping

·       Spending too much time in bed

DO NOT

·    Exaggerate the seriousness as this can lead to more worry, e.g. “I look ten years older after no sleep last night”

·       Let your world revolve around sleep

·       Cancel activities as that gives you more time to worry about the upcoming night

DO

·       Get on with things normal even if you have had a bad night sleep

·       Even if you don’t sleep, enjoy rest and relaxation, as these can be helpful

·       Accept that sleep problems are not dangerous

Good luck! Stay calm and sleep well…

© King’s College London

Dr. Anastasia Burelomova

Trainee Counseling Psychologist